Proposed Titles for my Autobiography. A Forum.

Photo Credit: Kristen C. Hansen - Flip Over For About The Author

Some day, I'll have a radical autobiography. Ah ah ah. I can hear you scoffing. Calling me "self-serving," "self-loathing," "self-loving." All that.

Please.

This autobiography's gonna be sick. What's my approach you ask? My writing style? Well, it's a cocktail of Peter Biskind, Studs Terkel, Terry Southern, Kurt Vonnegut, Rick James and a whole lotta James Frey-like embellishment. Doesn't that sound like something that'll sell better than Agassi? Maybe better than "The Secret," my readers?

It'll have sex (begging), guns (Nerf), drugs (Pabst), rock 'n' roll (or techno...), spats (spit too) and plenty more. Like the time I think my ex turned NOT SUITABLE FOR FREE PRESS. Or the time I thought Jungle Juice was just a goofy name. Or the time I brought that "thing" to 2nd-grade Catholic school. You know the "thing." And that's just a taste of the first 23 chapters of Blake Goble. Wait until you see chapter 30. It's gonna get RAW.

But, I'm at a bit of stand-still. With all this excitement oozing out of me, I need to give it some direction. A banner. A lead-in. A guiding light for the whole friggin' ordeal. Yeah, I need a title. I know, it seems silly when you think about how my Stephen King-sized name will overshadow the title. But, it is very important. So, I've come up with a couple, but please give me some ideas for a great autobiography title.

Here's a couple of titles:

1. "Who Farted?"

2. "Kristin/Lis/Ryan Did It"

3. "Pam and Roger are Gonna Shit"

4. "Les Incompetents"

5. "Beowulf"

6. "Don't Worry Blake. I Didn't Get In Trouble Because I Told My Parents It Was Yours."

7. "Blake Goble: A Sweaty Life"

8. "The Dork Knight"

9. "Ya Filthy Animals"

10. "Moonstruck, starring Cher"

11. "FFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUU..."

12. "Nailbiter. No Seriously, Goble, Stop Biting!"

13. "Heavyweights 2!"

Mind you, those ideas are just off the top my heads.

Anyone else have anything?